I’ve had a mental shift. When people ask me, “how’s your father,” I think, “forget that, how is my brother?”
Marc is the primary caregiver for Carmelo. Marc is a classic sandwich: taking care of his elderly father, raising his own children, commuting to his office in New York City. If Marc breaks down, none of this works.
2 paid caregivers work 7 days a week. But caregivers don’t manage themselves, can’t make big decisions, can’t take dad to the doctor and aren’t there for 3:00 am wandering.
How’s my father? He’s ok, some days are good, other days are not good.
What’s more important now is How is my brother. His health and well being. His needs come before dad’s.
We have to give family caregivers and paid caregivers an oxygen mask to put on first, if they are to take care of other people.
Did you ever reach this point of realization, that you have to put on your own oxygen mask first? Or is this some slippery slope? LMK by hitting “reply.”
Warmest wishes, Lisa